Megan has an interesting and awesome blog post here, about being a teacher, being an alcoholic, and being public with her addiction. It’s a short but worthwhile read. She talks of the strength of AA, but the fear of being an alcoholic and what the exposure would mean – until now, when she publicly blogs about it. And I totally get it. I have PTSD. I have had it, for coming up on a dozen years. It’s been, for too long, something we don’t talk about. Except – I’ve always talked about mine. And that was deliberate.
I’ve run up hills, through the jungle, and across pineapple fields this month. The stress of being back from Iraq would surely be taking more of a toll on me if I wasn’t running for distance, and if I wasn’t enjoying my time of solitude.
I’ve spent 4 months getting ready to run the 2009 Honolulu Marathon. This is the tale of my preparations, the run itself, and what I learned along the way.
I ran 18 miles today, including 2200+ feet of ascent. I did it in a little over 3 hours.
I got to to hang with some really cool people the other night. It was awesome. Photos and links galore.
I suspect that what I am about to say won’t be for everyone. Go ahead, skip this one. I won’t be offended.
I had a coworker ask me today why I’ve been so pissed off the last couple of days. It was as if time stopped. The words just hung there in the air, like cigarette smoke on a cold day. Pissed off? What the hell was he talking about? 13 years later, or what was probably only a second and a half, I spat out something about just having a lot on my mind lately. No, not angry, just lost in thought. Preoccupied. 1. Saying that, I realized later, probably made me sound like one of those guys you watch
Interesting article, here. I read a lot of articles about PTSD and the military, and I had seen one other one on GEN Ham and his problems. From this observer, I’d guess he had PTSD, but hey, if he wants to call it something else, so be it. I think it’s awesome that he’s willing to talk about it. I am not surprised that he doesn’t see it as a big deal. Now, how many other of our senior leaders are going to open up and talk about their stress and their combat experiences?
At 1005 the other morning, I was sitting in a conference room, listening to my heart. It was beating strong. It was beating a bit fast. More than anything, I wanted to put two fingers to my neck to better gauge what it was doing. In minutes, it would be my turn to speak. No overhead projector, no big screen with my slides. Two senior officers sat at the head table, flipping through slide packs. Buried in there were four slides of mine — Northern Iraq 101. No chance to read from a script — I’d be cold-stone-talking about
So, yeah. Bird Day. Three things: 1) I am thankful for my wife. Wow, she puts up with a ton of crap, just because I choose to be in the Army. I could make decent money, if I wasn’t in the Army. I could come home at a decent hour, if I wasn’t in the Army. I’d be home right now, if I wasn’t in the Army. I’ve come dangerously close, time and time again, to putting the needs of the Army ahead of the needs of my wife and my family. Time and time again, the Army has